The Ferens Farm

So the concrete is poured, the planting areas are planted, the garden is in full swing!  The mess we created now has order and beauty, and although it was a much longer process than we planned it was definitely worth it.  The front of our house looks a thousand times better than it did before.  Now all we need is a small excavator, a few days and some grass seed and it will look like a “normal” front yard, whatever that is!  Until then I am so happy, and so are the kids because they love the concrete and they love the dirt.  Thanks are in order to Jim and LaDonne who came over this week and helped us get the plants we bought in the ground!  Without you there would still be a lot of work to do and it wouldn’t have turned out nearly as nice.  Also, thanks to Hailey for helping us fill the wheelbarrow full of dirt, over and over and over again!

Currently in the garden there are: two varieties of tomatoes, artichokes, cucumber, cilantro, red and green pepper, sweet basil, garlic, leeks, two varieties of lettuce, snap peas, broccoli, onions, brussel sprouts, bush beans, two varieties of strawberries, spinach, and rhubarb!  It is a sampling year, we will see what we like and plan more of some things next year!  What fun this experiment has been so far.

After a LONG time waiting the cement was poured on Thursday morning, it turned out wonderful!

The kids were SERIOUSLY entertained by this whole production.  The truck was here at 7am, they were dressed and outside by 7:01 and stayed there watching until we left for school at 8:30.  It is expensive babysitting, but man my morning was peaceful with them outside.  I had no idea the kids were be so excited about the cement.  That is all they talked about all day Thursday and most of the day on Friday!  I guess they were anxious to have it poured too.  We have a lot more work to do outside, but having this portion done makes me feel like we are getting somewhere.  And the best part?  My car is in the garage again which I really appreciated during the pouring rain this morning as we were getting in the car.

When Brandon and I met and were headed towards marriage we talked about our future family.  What it would look like, how many kids we would have, etc.  Our “plan” was to be married a few years and then start our family, we would have two kids, one boy and one girl.  God started our family a bit earlier than we anticipated (7 months into marriage I was pregnant), but He also worked that out in a most beautiful way.  We started with our boy and then unexpectedly when Zac was 9 months old we discovered we were expecting again, this time with our girl, Zoey Breanne.  After the two whirlwind pregnancies, births, and a few moves we had the family we had “dreamed” about.  I just knew that this was it.  The whole thing happened so much faster than we planned, but it was good and I could see the positive side of how it had worked out.  We were done having kids, why would we want anymore?  We had our boy and girl, life was “full” and perfect.  When Zoey was a year old we were in the midst of buying property and designing our first home, which Brandon would build.  We knew this would be a sacrifice of time, but the kids were in a good place and I was up for the challenge of being a “single” mom for the next year or two while Brandon built our home.

Then, unexpectedly, I found out I was pregnant again…What? Why? God knew I had the family I had dreamed about, what was he doing now?  We added another bedroom to our house plans and nine months later Ally Capri was born.  Building delays had taken place and at the time we were only a few months into the construction phase of our new home.  I had a hard time after she was born.  Ally was perfect and beautiful and chubby (9 lbs. 14 oz when she was born), but emotionally it was a trying time.  We were stuck in a 800 square foot place, it was dark, Brandon was gone a lot working and building, and I had a 3 year old, a 1.5 year old and a new born…The funny thing is, despite my mental struggles, when Ally was about 3 weeks old I started dreaming about number four.  I would find myself feeling like I was missing a child when we were out.  I would think about number four like he/she was here already.  I knew that we were going to have another baby, but I didn’t share this with Brandon.  He was so busy, pushed to the max mentally and physically with our house project, work, the worship team, and leading our marriage study, not to mention being a father and a husband.

I continued to think about number four but kept this dream fairly close to my heart, eluding to it a few times and testing out my “insane” idea on a few friends.  Then, when the building project was getting close to completion, I started to feel like the time to get pregnant was close.  I wanted number four, if he/she was going to come, to be close in age like the other three.

One afternoon Brandon and I were on a “date” at Home Depot (here and Lowes were the only places we dated for about two years) and we were looking at the finishing fixtures for our bathrooms.  We were picking our mirrors, towel racks, toilet paper holders, etc.  We were standing in front of the bath towel racks, trying to decide on one for the kids bath, and I told Brandon I thought we needed hooks since all the racks only had enough room for two towels and we had three kids and therefore would need room for three towels.  He agreed so we started looking and the one I liked and that matched the bathroom had four hooks on it.  He jokingly looked at me and said, “You know that is setting us up for another one don’t you?”  I looked at him and said, “Well you know I want another one don’t you?”  His jaw dropped, he didn’t have much to say.  I beamed…less than two months later I was pregnant with our sweet number four, and final, Austin Jerald.

I now think back to our “plan” and wonder what that would have been like…boring I am sure!  My life is full, a bit crazy, but perfectly wonderful!  God’s plan is always perfect, regardless if it matches up with ours.  I wish I could remember this all the time and live in this truth, but I have to struggle to remind myself of it somedays.  I love that I can have faith and trust in the creator of the universe.  That He is intimately connected to my life, that he cares about every detail, that He is perfect, unchanging, loving, graceful, forgiving, and so much more.  Thank you God for my husband and children, help me to remember that your plan is so much better than mine.

So I wanted to have a small garden this year, but I was feeling bad about asking Brandon to build a raised bed (which is what I wanted) because he is so busy and has so many other projects he is working on.  Reluctantly I mentioned my desire to him and within a few days he started his work.  I was so excited.  I ordered a few packets of seeds and bought a northwest gardening book, I was ready, or so I thought.

Brandon started by building the raised bed, Zac helped.

Then Brandon and his dad put it in the ground.

They filled it with “magical dirt.”

They tilled it in and it was ready for me.

Now it sits…

Why haven’t I put anything in it?  My starts are dying because they need to get outside in the ground, but I am being a reluctant gardener.  I guess I thought that the “magical dirt” that I HAD to have was going to do it all for me, no such luck.  All I have to do is buy a few more starts and place everything in the ground and I can not get the motivation up to do it.  I feel so guilty…what is my problem?  Why did I place this project ahead of all others but I can’t fulfill my part of the deal?  Maybe it is all the things that get in the way: laundry, cooking, dishes, meal planning, playing, cleaning, managing, driving, diapering, bathing, mentoring, studying, packing lunches…the list could go on and on.  I so want to have a garden, I am trying not to feel discouraged.  I wish I could just get a few hours, kid free to work on it, but so far the days and evenings have been so full I can’t seem to find this time.  I look out the window and say, “Please garden and magical dirt, don’t give up on me.  I haven’t forgotten about you…”

The mess is now looking like controlled choas!  Brandon has been working hard in our front yard and we will be ready to pour concrete this week (I hope the contractor is to!)  When we decided to start this project I had no idea what we were getting ourselves in for, and that was probably a good thing.  I keep reminding myself that when it is all done I will be so happy, walking through the mud and dirt and parking outside of the covered oasis of my garage is getting to me!

Yesterday we spent the whole day outside as a family, working on the yard.  We started at 9am and didn’t come in until nearly 6pm, it was fun, but Brandon and I both felt like we got hit by a truck at the end of the day!   The day was full of digging, moving, measuring, raking, leveling, and kid managing.  (I did some of the physical work, but the majority of my time was spent with the kids, I wanted to be helpful but the little ones kept getting in the way!)  The whole day I was dreaming about a time when the kids could be more self sufficient and I could actually accomplish something…but until then I will do my best to support Brandon, even if it is just from a chair while I am nursing.